Social Skills II: Basic non-verbal communication, emotions in others and meeting new people on 9/29/20

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How’s it going?  Ice breaker if you ‘all don’t want to talk.

What was helpful about last session?  What was not helpful about last time?  Any questions?

Refection’s on hurt and the purpose of group.


80% of communication in most people is non-verbal

-People with ASD features have a hard time with Non-Verbal

-The forms of non verbal

Eyes/Eye Contact



Body Direction

Hand Movement

Tone of Voice

Ways to deal with the non verbal

-Just have the other personal verbalize everything they do (for people who are close to us)

-Get the general non-verbal’s down

  • Mouth Shape
  • Body Direction
  • Eye Brows
  • Eye Contact (look at forehead)
  1. Find ways to improve understanding of non verbal communication
    • Like DIY at home, YouTube is (probally) your friend, find resources on YouTube to help.  Make sure they are from reliable sources.

Some examples of good ones

Social Times Workbook can be a good basic intro to Social Skills.


-Basic Natural Emotions- Wilcox with Addendums Feelings Wheel

  • What emotions are related/what are opposite

-What Non Verbal communications go with Feelings Wheel


      Smiling/Calm Face: May be Joyful, Powerful, Peaceful

      Increase Heart Rate/Sweating: Scared/Mad/Joyful

-Other examples using Plutchik Feelings Wheel with Anime Faces

MEETING NEW PEOPLE-(Most ideas below are from Talk With Me by Mataya et al.)

Step 1:  Say Hi, state your name, ask their name

-90% of meeting new people is to ask questions. Good questions include comments about:

  • Where you are
  • Who your with
  • Work/School
  • Where your from
  • What you are doing here

Use Scanning questions to find commonality with others. Ask open relatable questions, say ONE thing about self and then ask a question, eg.  

  • I do X for fun, what do you do for fun?
  • I do X for work (or want to do), what do you do (or want to do) for work?
  • Man, I hate/love X, what do you think of X?
  • I like/dislike it here, what do you think?

-Good Rules of Thumb when Meeting New People:

  • Answers should be no longer than 2-4 sentences
  • If you will see the person again (unless you really hit it off) talk a short time and move on
  • Meeting new people is like interviewing them to see if they are worth talking to, don’t take it too seriously
  • Some people are A-holes, don’t give up if people blow you off


Free Discussion

Next week-The basics of conversation and good starting topics