The basics of conversation and good starting topics 10/13/20

I. How was the last 2 weeks?

II. Review of non-verbal communication and Feelings Wheel.

III. Topics that are usually safe to talk with new people about (not all of them) we will look at bigger list (from Talk With Me):

  • Where your at
  • Who you are with
  • What you do/school/what you want to do
  • Weird (but not gross things)
  • Hobbies (if common)
  • Pets
  • Family (who you live with, family of origin)….Not bad stuff, eg. fights, trauma
  • Books
  • Video Games/Tech
  • Movies
  • Where you went to school
  • Vacations/Travel
  • Other (Ken will show or talk about)

A good rule of thumb is to talk about things that most people have experienced or have interests in.

IV. Open vs Closed Questions…….. Scanning Questions

V. Focus of conversation approach for today (from Talk With Me)

Step 1: IDENTIFY TOPIC, then 3 components of conversation:


a. Remember that when meeting new people 90% of the conversation is asking questions, always ask a question when done talking

b. Make sure not to talk too long, between 2-5 sentences max.


Topic: Movies

TELL A STORY: I went to see the movie Budapest Hotel. It was a comady about a grand hotel between the 1st and 2nd world wars.

MAKE A COMMENT: It was very funny and the colors it was filmed in was great.

ASK A QUESTION: What movies do you like? (related to topic) OR what do you do to relax (scanning question related to topic)


VII. Another approach to conversation (more advanced, better for people you know) LAMA

  1. L- Listen
  2. A-Acknowledge (reflect what was said in a personal way)
  3. M- Make a statement/ask a question
  4. A-Ask a question

VIII. Thoughts and questions?

IX. Next time: Friendship and other close relationships

Talk with Me - AAPC Publishing